Shadow makes an appearance

That shadow that lurks.....it's on the back of my mind. It's like a rain cloud on the horizon. It's back.

This is my third day and I'm beginning to despair.

I need to be free of this shadow that hangs over me.

I'm struggling to write this. I keep zoning out. I keep wanting to stop. I simply want to curl up in bed.

Tomorrow will be better, hopefully this afternoon will be better.  I have to keep telling myself this. I have to work hard to keep up the desire to fight.

Sometimes it just feels too much effort. Today is one of those days.

I get angry and frustrated with myself. Why is this happening to me?

The doctor reminds me that some people can get depression due to genetic reasons. I like my life. I am happy with the direction things are going. I wouldn't change anything. So what is it that has made me feel so empty and low?

The easy answer would be to change the things you don't like for things that you do like. But honestly and genuinely I would change nothing.

Tomorrow, I promise, will be better.

sr